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- the workings of an easily distracted fangirl


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Prompt Fic: Apples
btvs//faith/xander connected - me
whiskyinmind wrote in fandomsbitca
Title Apples
Author Shona, aka Mara (whiskyinmind)
Rating 15/R
Pairing Xander/Faith
Notes for flyingcarpet. Ended up being so much darker than I expected, but I hope not *too* dark for you sweetie!
a/n #2 the prize of a drabble /ficlet with the pairing/character of your choice to the first person who correctly identifies where the title came from…



He never talks about it. Sometimes I find myself wondering if he even remembers it. But… of course he does. He could've died. I could've killed him.

But we don't talk about it.

Sometimes, after sex, when everything's quiet and his arms are around me, I'll stroke his chest. He both tenses and relaxes under my touch. I can trace every muscle. I know them all in my heart; in my soul. But then I move upwards, I let my fingers trace the contours of his collarbone and he pulls away.

He doesn't say anything and I don't push it. I've learned to accept that he doesn't like to be touched there. Or maybe it's that he doesn't like me to touch him there.

But we don't talk about it.

Tonight it's the big party. The anniversary.

A celebration because we all survived; a wake because so many others didn't.

Everyone drinks more than they should. Even me.

It's been so long since I have.

I hate losing control. I know what could happen if I do. But he's with me. Somehow I know: he won't ever let me cross that line.

But we don't talk about that.

He takes me home, and I'm glad. We kiss hungrily and it's not exactly a surprise when we gravitate towards the bedroom. He's tender. He strips my clothes off gently, reverentially, and we make love slowly. Sweetly.

I'm no stranger to sex, but honestly? I never made love until I met him.

But I don't talk about it.

Eventually, I'm drowsy. Sated. But amazingly he wants more. Needs more.

He teases me.

Light touches, tiny kisses, gradually he wakes a fire in me that I can't ignore and we begin to move in that uncontrollable rhythm.

I'm lost.

Suddenly I can't breathe and I look into his eyes. I feel his hands on my throat and I see nothing reflected back.

As darkness edges into my vision, I hear him say, "Lemme guess. You forgot the safety word…"

I know I'm lost. But I won't talk about that.
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Hmm, is it the old saying "apples for apples, " meaning you get what you give?

Nice and dark, BTW. A scary but believable Xander.

Although the saying is apt, it's not where the title came from. Sorry!

Thanks!

Oooh, this is fantastic. Gave me chills with my morning coffee. :D

I love how you move through several different emotions in the course of this short fic -- Faith's self-doubt, the tenderness between them, and then the darker tone at the end. There's a lot packed in there but you did a great job transitioning between them.

The refrain of "we don't talk about it," combined with her not saying the safety word is just perfect. And the end! It's definitely dark, but that's what I like about these two -- the balance of light and dark.

This is wonderful -- thank you!

I'm so glad you like it sweetie!

Love this! Wow!


Gabrielle

Thank you so much sweetie!

Kinda dark that ending there... :(

But keeping up with a conversation you, Nemo and me had more than a year ago, well, I doubt Xander could harm Faith all that much, not with his bare hands.

She'd just need to strain her neck muscles a bit, and presto, problem solved. :D

Yup, I'm all about the darkness sometimes. *g*

And yup, he couldn't hurt her. Unless she didn't stop him...

Whoa -- what a twist!

This was good if very sad. Somehow it feels by not talking about it she's dragging Xander down into the darkness with her. Gave me a very melancholy feeling.

That, right there, is exactly the mood I was going for. Yay!

Thanks for reading!

That's creepy but very good.

Creepy - in a good way. The refrain about not talking works perfectly.

Wow. It's so dark, and sad, and ambiguous...

I'm no stranger to sex, but honestly? I never made love until I met him.

Awww...

The ending is absolutely unexpected - but... have I understood correctly? Has The First materialized in Xander's body?

Thank you so much! I tried to leave the ending deliberately ambiguous - it could be the First, it could be something inate in Xander leading to a long delayed 'pay back' or it could be something else entirely (has Faith deliberately 'forgotten' the safety word for example?)

Thank you again!

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